Who are you and what is your WHY?

Hello everyone my name is Lindsey Hall I hope you all are enjoying THIS IS GOODs 1st birthday celebration. In honor of it, I wanted to talk a little bit about a part of the book that I have found so important.

“When you know WHO you are and WHY you are doing what you are doing, you will have an unshakable confidence.”- Tami Matheny

For a long time, I was just drifting through life, never really knowing WHY I was doing anything I was doing. And more importantly, I had no clue WHO I was. These two things are important to know whether you are an athlete, mom, coach, friend, daughter, son, father, CEO, janitor, or doctor. It does not matter what you do, knowing the answer to both these questions will help you have the confidence to pick yourself back up when adversity strikes. Let’s briefly discuss these two questions and how we can find the answer to them both.

Who are you?

“Confidence rests on something that circumstances can’t take away, choose to base confidence on what will never change- the true essence of who you are, not on your daily activities.”- Tami Matheny.

Who you are is not defined by:

  • How much money you have
  • What kind of car you drive
  • How well you played in your last game
  • How many games your team has won
  • The kind of job you have
  • How much you weigh
  • How much of your to-do list you got done


Sure, all of those things are great when they are working out in your favor but what about when they are not? When you base how you see yourself based on performance, you will live a very disappointing life. When you know who you are, you will no longer have to ride that emotional roller-coaster of when things are good you love yourself when things are bad you hate yourself. You will know who you are is not defined by circumstances but rather defined by the deeper values and belief sets that you decided for yourself.


So, let’s decide today WHO ARE YOU?



I have found that the best way to figure this out is first to ask yourself; who you don’t want to be or who you are not.

Then write out the qualities and characteristics of the type of person you wish to be.

Once you have decided who you are not, and who you want to be, you must start seeing yourself as that person. Example: You decided you want to be a more patient person. Then all day long you must start to view yourself as a patient person. Then when situations arise, ask yourself, “how would a patient person respond to this?”.



What’s your WHY?


“He who has a WHY to live for can bear almost any how.”- Fredrick Nietzsche


Now this one is pretty simple. When you know WHY you are doing something it is easier to keep pushing through even when you don’t feel like you want to. For instance, if I didn’t know why I had to study before a test I probably wouldn’t do it. But when I know why I am studying for the test, because if I don’t study, I will fail and then won’t be able to graduate, I am more likely to push through and study because my goal is to graduate and not fail out of school.


So, ask yourself what is your WHY? Why are you doing what you are doing? When you figure that out write it down and put it somewhere you can look at when you are struggling and wanting to give up.




  • Why am I a coach? I am a coach because I love helping people reach their full potential
  • Why am I a teacher?  I am a teacher because I love sharing my knowledge with others and watching them grow
  • Why do I work at my current job? I work at my current job because I have a family to support and without my income, they wouldn’t have a roof over their head or food on the table.


I hope you found this helpful and remember THIS IS GOOD!!


Written by: Lindsey Hall

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R2LC is owner by Tami Matheny. She is a Mental Game Coach and Author. Her books include: “This is Good” at: https://r2lc.com/this-is-good-a-journey-on-overcoming-confidence. “The Confident Athlete: 4 Easy Steps to Build and Maintain Confidence”  https://r2lc.com/the-confident-athlete-4-easy-steps-to-build-and-maintain-confidence/ and “The Confidence Journal”. All books can be purchased online at Amazon. For group discounts or signed copies contact http://tami@r2l.mysites.io.

Tami owns and runs, Refuse2LoseCoaching which provides mental coaching for athletes and teams at all levels. For more information on mental training contact tami@r2l.mysites.io, follow us on twitter @tamimatheny and @r2lcoaching and visit our website: https://r2lc.com.

For daily confidence tips, sign up for the monthly confidence calendar: https://r2lc.com/monthly-confidence-calendar-newsletter/.

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