We face uncertainty and things we can’t control everyday. The most successful people learn to grow during these times. The following formula will help you overcome adversity and uncertainty in everything you encounter:
Unity + Positive Emotions = Success
UNITY- Endure together- find strength in each other. Rely on your teammates. Each person on your team brings different strengths to the table. It is the blend of these strengths that brings the team through adversity. During difficult times more than any other, it is important to remember this.
PE-Positive Emotions. When we allow negative emotions to control us, our brain has less ability to respond to the situation in front of us. The more positive emotions we create, the greater our capacity to handle adversity.
Getting upset and focusing on what you don’t have does 2 things:
- It wastes your time.
- It emotionally paralyzes you or even worse, it emotionally sinks you.
It is ok to cry/get upset/talk about it, but in a limited fashion and then shift to focusing on opportunities. Below you will find 6 ways to help you successfully navigate adversity and uncertainty:
- Learn to stay in the moment. A great acronym I use is W.I.N.- What’s Important Now. When I focus on what use to be, or get anxious looking too far ahead, I use W.I.N. to get me back in the moment. All I can do is take care of the moment. If I take care of the moment, I will be better prepared for the future.
- Find the good. Nothing is either good or bad until we decide it is. Train your brain to find the good in every situation that happens. Read the following African folklore: https://r2lc.com/2020/03/23/this-is-good-2/
- Stay in your Me Circle. Staying focused on the controllables has a strong correlation to increased confidence. Things such as effort, focus, and attitude are within your control, so they are inside your circle. Things such as coaches and administrative decisions, winning, scoring, and teammates are not 100% within your control so they are outside your circle. When you focus on things within your “Me Circle” you are more likely to have a positive experience.
EXERCISE: Draw a circle on a piece of paper. Inside the circle, write everything in your sport you can control 100%. Then, outside the circle, write things you cannot control 100%. *This exercise can be found in “The Confident Athlete” as well as “Start Strong for Teams.”
- Stay focused on your “why.” Why do you do what you do? What is your bigger purpose- more than the wins, results, etc.? If you don’t know your “why” it’s easy to get disconnected from your team or to struggle with your confidence and your focus. Knowing your “why” keeps you afloat during challenging times and gives you a clearer vision to see the “this is good” moments. It steers your focus to what you need to do in the moment. When your “why” is bigger than winning or losing or playing time, it becomes more powerful. What is the bigger picture you are journeying toward? When we can honestly answer this question, finding the “this is good” in bad things that happen is much easier.
- Growth Mindset. People with a growth mindset believe that abilities and skills can be developed and strengthened through commitment and hard work. Having a growth mindset allows us to better handle any circumstance we face. Take a look at the following chart. The more you can change your thoughts to the left side, the more you will develop a growth mindset.
You can move through anything smoothy if you view it positively and stay active. Most obstacles lead to opportunities if you allow them.
For more information on overcoming adversity, check out, “This is Good”at: https://r2lc.com/this-is-good-a-journey-on-overcoming-confidence.
Tami Matheny is a Mental Game Coach and Author. She has also written, “The Confident Athlete: 4 Easy Steps to Build and Maintain Confidence” https://r2lc.com/the-confident-athlete-4-easy-steps-to-build-and-maintain-confidence/ and “The Confidence Journal”. All books can be purchased online at Amazon. For group discounts or signed copies contact http://tami@r2l.mysites.io.
Tami owns and runs, Refuse2LoseCoaching which provides mental coaching for athletes and teams at all levels. For more information on mental training contact tami@r2l.mysites.io, follow us on twitter @tamimatheny and @r2lcoaching and visit our website: https://r2lc.com.
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